Class of 2017 Appreciation
The below speech was given by Student Council President Abigail STUBENHOFER ’17 at the Commencement Ceremony on June 8, 2017.
Good evening, everyone. Today I am honored to speak on behalf of our Ellis community. I have wanted to give this speech since the first grade, when our class was given these white graduation hats and looked at old photographs of the Ellis commencement. It is hard to believe that 12 years later I am standing here wearing one of these hats, giving this speech. I had one year to prepare for this moment but I did not anticipate just how hard it would be to say, “Goodbye. Thank you. I love you.”
Good evening, everyone. Today I am honored to speak on behalf of our Ellis community. I have wanted to give this speech since the first grade, when our class was given these white graduation hats and looked at old photographs of the Ellis commencement. It is hard to believe that 12 years later I am standing here wearing one of these hats, giving this speech. I had one year to prepare for this moment but I did not anticipate just how hard it would be to say, “Goodbye. Thank you. I love you.”
Today I am tasked with speaking about our Ellis community, and what it means to be an Ellis girl...but what we have at this school is nearly impossible to describe. For my thirteen years at Ellis, I have said to friends and family alike “You wouldn’t understand unless you went to my school.” While brainstorming about what to say tonight, I decided that rather than struggling to capture in words what Ellis means to us, I will focus on concrete tangibles: What is the legacy of an Ellis education? My classmates and I leave Ellis and begin college with what skills?
There are the obvious answers. As Ellis students we are adept at writing essays, analyzing arguments and data, giving presentations, reciting the periodic table, and succeeding in all arenas whether it be academics, the arts, or athletics. The art of multitasking while sleep deprived and stressed is no challenge after this place. However, I cannot limit the scope of this speech to a discussion of the competency that my classmates bring to all of their pursuits. To do so would shortchange my peers and this institution. The Ellis School cultivates something in each one of us that is far more consequential. The Ellis experience, whether it be thirteen years, four, or even just two, gives to its students a strong sense of self.
I was raised to believe that no matter what happens, you must always stay true to who you are. It was here in this community that my concept of who I am evolved. Perhaps this is why I find Ellis so beautiful. I walk down the hallway and see students, teachers, faculty, and staff, being completely true to themselves. It’s as if we walk down the halls with a sign that says “here we are world, take us or leave us.” How, you may ask, is this strong sense of self fostered ? I feel certain that it is the people in the Ellis community that have given us such a keen understandings of ourselves and such a firm sense of belonging.
I must start by acknowledging the teachers sitting before me. Maybe more than anyone, you have taught us what it means to be beautifully individual. You embrace each student, learning difference, and challenge with grace and compassion. You teach us not to be discouraged by our differences but rather to accept them and use them to our advantage. You may think that all these years, you were only teaching us to tie our shoes, write in cursive, make a graph, and write a thesis. When really, every time you sat with us after school to reteach a math lesson, answered our emails at eleven at night, read us your favorite poem, and conversed with us in your free time, you were telling us that we matter. By believing in us, you helped us believe in ourselves.
At Ellis it is not uncommon to find students eating lunch with teachers, just to talk about life, or last night’s episode of Downton Abbey. My class is normally plastered to the floor of Mrs. Dotson’s office, talking, yelling, and laughing about topics ranging from Grey’s Anatomy to Toni Morrison’s definition of the white gaze. You can also find us knocking on Mrs. Laschon’s back door, with our hands out, begging for chocolate in times of great angst.
At Ellis it is not uncommon to find students eating lunch with teachers, just to talk about life, or last night’s episode of Downton Abbey. My class is normally plastered to the floor of Mrs. Dotson’s office, talking, yelling, and laughing about topics ranging from Grey’s Anatomy to Toni Morrison’s definition of the white gaze. You can also find us knocking on Mrs. Laschon’s back door, with our hands out, begging for chocolate in times of great angst.
No discussion of how we discover ourselves at Ellis would be complete without an understanding of the the curriculum we navigate. The work we do here, especially at the Upper School level, is meaningful because it challenges you not just to learn route facts but to learn to think for yourself. At Ellis, we are taught to engage in analysis and evaluate scholarly arguments, but most importantly we learn what it is that we believe, and how we can support our case. For example, in our Spanish 4 class, we did not focus upon how one orders food or gets directions in spanish. Instead, we wrote and memorized presentations on issues threatening South American countries, such as domestic violence and environmental challenges. Our teachers infuse their curriculum with their passions and in turn we fall in love with their classes.
This year, in my AP European history class there were four students. One day, Mr. Bisno was unable to fully answer a student’s question. That night, our class of four received an email with approximately 7 different documents attached, and Mr. Bisno’s note explaining that he was upset that his response in class that day had not been adequate. Naturally, he spent his evening researching the topic for several hours until he was able to send us a detailed explanation.
But even throughout some of these chaotic, exhausted, and long days, our teachers are the reason why we have the confidence to be ourselves: to ask unique questions, fight injustice, and challenge ideas. On behalf of the Ellis community and my class, I thank you. We will cherish memories of dancing in your classrooms, laughing in your offices, and absorbing your brilliance.
My mom has always told me that to have a strong sense of self, you first must have a strong sense of other. This brings me to my final point: the relationships that I have forged at Ellis have shaped me more than anything else. When you attend a small and intimate school like Ellis, having a strong sense of other is absolutely crucial. In a class of around 30 students, each with a different story, there is no room for selfishness or exclusion. This has always been apparent to the Ellis class of 2017. I find it unbelievable how genuinely kind my classmates are to one another. Our family is made of 30 strong, individual, driven, and curious people. Our home, is the senior lounge. This is where we gather for family snack during cake week, where we argue about people’s “meat” preferences, and where we quite literally sit in our own filth. We truly do not know the meaning of boundaries. We discuss bodily functions and laugh at inappropriate jokes. Sometimes I fear that when our group of 30 moves on to college, people will find our openness concerning. But then I remember that I would not trade this intimacy for anything in the world. How strange it is to feel such a strong bond and sense of security in high school: to know that you never have to apologize or feel embarrassed for who you are.
Our class is uniquely supportive, never competitive. When one of us is rewarded for academic, artistic, or athletic excellence, we celebrate their triumphs as a family. This community of thirty encouraged all of us to understand ourselves. This is what it means to have a strong sense of other. In the words of Dorothy to the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz, I need to say to my classmates, “I think I’ll miss you most of all.”
Our class is uniquely supportive, never competitive. When one of us is rewarded for academic, artistic, or athletic excellence, we celebrate their triumphs as a family. This community of thirty encouraged all of us to understand ourselves. This is what it means to have a strong sense of other. In the words of Dorothy to the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz, I need to say to my classmates, “I think I’ll miss you most of all.”
Having acknowledged the faculty and my friends, I must thank our families for giving us this experience. This is the greatest gift you can ever give a child. And to all of Ellis, next year I know that many of us will feel so homesick for this place, these people, and this feeling of belonging. I can never thank you enough. I do not like saying goodbye, because that seems too permanent… so instead I will say see you later. I will leave you with the words of one of my favorite poet’s, Rupi Kaur, who, I think says “Thank You. Goodbye, and I love you” better than anyone.
“you have made it to the end. With my heart in your hands. Thank you. For arriving here safely. For being tender with the most delicate part of me. Sit down. Breathe. You must be tired. Let me kiss your hands. Your eyes. They must be wanting of something sweet. I am sending you all my sugar. I would be nowhere and nothing if it were not for you. You’ve helped me become the woman i wanted to be. But was too afraid to be. Do you have any idea how much of a miracle you are. How lovely it’s been. And how lovely it will always be. I am kneeling before you. Saying thank you. I am sending my love to your eyes. May they always see the goodness in people. And may you always practice kindness. May we see each other as one. May we be nothing short of in love with everything the universe has to offer. And may we always stay grounded. Rooted. Our feet planted firmly onto the earth.”
-- a love letter, from me to you.
Thank you.
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